A Poem about adoption from a birth father.

Someone naively said once ” adoption is the easy way”.

I beg to differ.

When presented with a choice of this magnitude, how would you respond ?

I have seen too many times people choose the self-serving and selfish road.

Never with any real consideration of the ramifications of their choice. Who is this for? Is it for your child or yourself?

Who does this effect?

Who will suffer?

We have answered all these questions too many times to count, and many more.

I do not do this for me…i do this for HIM, THEM, for US.

We did not make this decision lightly or on a whim.

My soul hurts everytime I think about what I can not give my son. “I” the father, the provider.

I claim responsibility for our choice.

This our sacrifice.

Our burden to bear.

We will miss out of all the joys of parenthood…the giggles, the sense of wonderment, the daily “I love you”.

Yet we will NOT miss out of the sense of pride, the knowledge that we helped turn a couple into a family, the feeling that the right thing has been done for everyone’s sake.

Though we will NOT not be able to hold him when he cries or laugh when he makes a joke, we will always be here…for him…for them.

For every second we spend with him we will cherish.

Will there be pain?….yes Will there be sorrow?…yes For I do not know what the world has in store for him, I will take solace in the fact that he is loved by so many, he will have opportunities I could not provide.

We will think about him everyday…that is a promise!

We are not losing a child, we a adding another limb to out family tree.

I have never been one who puts credence in others option of myself, nor will I start now.

This is OUR decision…OUR correct decision.

For all we lose, we gain so much more… ten fold.

Now that you have heard the rantings of my heart.

With tears in my eyes and optimism in my soul, I ask you one simple question: Do you really and truly believe this is the “Easy Way”?

-Thomas Castleberry; Loving birth father to Graham

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